Monday, February 28, 2011

Here's Looking At You

Guess what? I have to have cataract surgery. It's no big deal. In fact, people I know who have had it done say it's like having a new pair of eyes. Everything is supposed to look brighter and clearer, and I'll never have to be concerned about distance vision again. Damn, I thought cataract surgery was for old people. Then I realized, I am an old people.

I was doing fine with this whole thing until I read the disclaimer in the doctors office this morning; especially #7. It stated, "There are risks involved with cataract surgery such as brain damage, permanent blindness, and death."  'Oh swell, ' I thought!. 'And I'm supposed to sign this!?'

The choice I have is to not have the cataracts removed and go blind, or have them out and enjoy a better quality of life, keeping disclaimer #7 on the back burner.  

I decided, instead of a topical anesthesia just before the surgical procedure, I'm gonna ask for a bottle of Jack Daniels with a straw. Then I'll raise a toast to the world and say, "Here's looking at you", before  I zonk out somewhere in la-la land.

On the other hand, maybe I'll sip some of that JD this evening and opt for the mandatory eye-numbing drops before surgery next week.  They tell me it's no big deal.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Say It Like It Is

No one wants to be offensive, so we beat-around-the-bush, candy-coat, and create verbal puffery. My motto is, "say it like it is" rather than being euphemistic. Of course, I get into lots of trouble that way, but it cuts through all the horse pucky.

This is a test. After each statement choose a number from one to three that best describes how you would respond to a given situation.

How would you tell someone they need to use deordorant more frequently? Pick one.
1. You stink.
2. You smell bad.
3. You need to learn how to develop good hygiene habits. 

You're at a restaurant and someone has bad table manners. What would you say?
1. You're disgusting.
2. You eat like a pig.
3. You need to develop more refined table manners.

A friend at a neighborhood gathering is acting loud and obnoxious. Again, what would you say?
1. Shut up!
2. You have a big mouth.
3. You need to develop a quieter way to communicate.

For those of you who consistently chose #1, you probably have no friends and someone is hiring a "hit" on you.

All those who picked #2 have a few friends who call you, and only when when they need to borrow money.

Those who are consistently in the #3 category are blessed with an abundance of patience and have friends who always want to be with you but secretly think you are boring.

I'm sure most of you are a combination of one through three, which makes you a decent human being who most people want to be with the majority of the time.

Then there's me, who chose mostly #1 and #2. That's why I have two horses and a cat, and work out of my home.   

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Support Our Troops

Even though I don't approve of any war, I do support our troops. I received an email from one of my cohorts at Nazareth College with this cool link.  I put a "Support Our Troops" badge on the Horse Pucky blog under "Followers" for further assistance.

When you check out the "Lets Say Thanks" link you'll find student drawings from all grade levels. They are just wonderful!

Be sure to send an e-card with your favorite drawing. It's a great way to show appreciation to our men and women overseas who are putting their lives on the line so we can enjoy ours.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Dish Towels Gone Bad

Most of the time I find the perfect present for the people on my gift list. There are excepions to the rule as in the case of the not-so-perfect dish towels gone bad.

Jon needed dish towels, so I went to the dollar store and found some man-type kitchen towels, which cost a dollar each. So far, so good. The colors were white and yellow plaid, green and white plaid, and burgundy with navy and yellow trim. Again, so far, so good. They were 100% cotton absorbant. 'Not bad for a buck apiece', I thought. So, I bought them.

After going through the laundry, just once, they shrunk to  wash-cloth size with lovely puckered edges. To make matters worse, every time Jon or I went to wipe water or spilled coffee off the counter, the towels just spread the liquid around. So much for being absorbant.

The long and short of it, the towels got thrown in the trash barrel. They weren't even  suitable to take to the barn due to their lack of absorbancy. Everytime we dipped the towels in water, the water beaded off of them like RainX on a windshield.

Like they say, "You get what you pay for."

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Valentine Question for Jon

Jon already asked me what I wanted for Valentine's Day and I told him. ( See January 28th post.) What I neglected to tell you is what Jon said when I asked him, "Hey, honey, what do YOU want for Valentine's day?" He said, "A little piece and quiet."

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Don't Ask: Just Add Captions

Don't ask! Well, ok, I'll tell ya anyway. Just a little bit of background: Jon and I decided to clean out the inside of his floor-level kitchen cabinet, which houses two 3 foot tall wastebaskets. Jon is six feet tall. I'm five feet two inches. The logical choice was for me to go in and do the job. So, I did...and kinda got stuck.

Of course, Jon couldn't pass up this unique photo opportunity. And, of course, being the ham I am, I couldn't pass up a chance for a bit of zany good humor. This is what happens to normally sane people, in February, in upstate New York before drinking.

If you're gonna come up with wisecracks, all you smarty britches out there had better turn them into captions. There may be a reward in this for ya.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Fifties Were Nifty, Except for the Fashions

Last night I had a good laugh. I was going through some old photos I keep in a hatbox, and found some of my 8th grade pictures. The "in" thing to wear in the fifties were poodle skirts and saddle shoes with white socks. I don't have a scanner, so I checked out a website with fifties fashion pictures.  I found one that perfectly represents what we used to wear 55 years ago. In fact, it's identical to one of my outfits, including the color coordinated neck and pony tail scarf with a wide cinch belt. 

It's hard to believe we actually wore clothes like that! Some day, they may even  make a comback. As for me, I'll stick to my comfortable jeans and tee shirts.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Valentine's Day Songs Just for You

After taking a poll, two of you said to keep the music. I wasn't too sure what I wanted to do so I gave Horse Pucky a tuneless three days to see what it would be like. Three days with no tunes made me feel naked; so I'm keeping the music.

Here are five Valentine songs just for you. Three are unconventional, but fun and a tad off the wall, but they work for Valentine's Day. Diana Krall is my favorite female jazz vocalist, so she's  listed singing two romantic songs. Enjoy!

At the very bottom of the blog posts, in the center, is a playlist. You can mute it, choose whatever song you like, or adjust the volume on your computer. Enjoy the music with a glass of merlot or a great cup of coffee and have fun. Hugs. ~Pam