Friday, December 2, 2011

Horse Pucky Advice: Face Lifts and Beyond

Dear Horse Pucky,

My husband was looking at me kind of funny when I got out of the shower this morning and mentioned that certain parts of my anatomy are looking droopy. He suggested plastic surgery to "perk up" those parts and even offered to pay for the procedures. I'm leery to go under the knife for any reason. What should I  do?


Dear Droopy,

Don't do it!! I'm sure you're beautiful just the way you are. As we age, gravity naturally takes over, and who cares anyway. I mean, what's really important here! If you want to tone up, go to the gym and find a trainer who will help you get into shape gradually.

Have your husband take a good look at what's drooping on him, then offer him a can of spray starch along with a can of putty and a sharp-edged putty knife.

~Horse Pucky


lightly said...

if you 20 something get your droopy ass to the gym
if you 30 something get your droopy ass to the gym
if you 40 something get your droopy ass to the gym
if you 50 something get your droopy ass to the gym
if you 60 something kick your husband in the nuts.

if your husband is making dumbass comments there is a good chance any pants with a size 40 waist or smaller will not fit his fat ass.
tell him to go to the gym with you five times a week and you will both lose the droopy ass/boobs.
and at a wild guess here, tell your husband that man boobs is not sexy.

Anonymous said...

Tell him, 'take it or leave it'. Why shouldn't HE go under the knife. Honestly, Pam, it makes me mad that women should need to be "perked up". The men don't get prettier with age either. It's sexist thinking.

~Carla (I'll get off my soapbox now.)

Pamela Beers. said...

What lightly said is oh so true, See Carla's comment, too.
Men with boobs and droopy dicks
need silly putty with glue.

I get absolutely furious with men who think women need to make surgical changes to their bodies in order to look younger.

~Horse Pucky

Randy Johnson said...

Dear Droopy:
Next time you hear a comment like that in the shower I suggest you turn the water all the way to cold and say “There, that’s as perky as it gets buddy… Take it or leave it!”

Pamela Beers. said...

Randy, br-r-r-r, there's gotta be a better way. ;-)