Unfitness

Today's the day to start our physical fitness program...or not. It's the kind of program that'll make us healthy, slim, and attractive like the models in magazine ads. But, who cares about them.

Personally, I'm big into unfitness. One of my favorite foods is a puffy, powdered-sugar, raspberry jelly-filled donut followed by a bag of salty potato chips. In fact, my heart just skipped a beat just thinking about it.

Have you ever watched joggers, especially marathon runners? They appear gaunt and always look hungry. If the truth be known, they're probably craving one of those jelly donuts.  

Don't delay. Start your exercise program today. The more painful the better. Begin with squats, jogging, and lifting your neighbor's Volkswagen . While you're all out there huffing and puffing, I'm going to enjoy my donut and chips. Happy trails. 

Jog on over to Jenny's for more entertainment.

  



Seriously?!

First of all I can't believe it's been over a month since I've posted anything. The reason...read the following paragraph.

Just a quick note, I had to make a quick trip to Florida to help with transitioning my 94 year old mother from her own home to a skilled nursing facility. It was a difficult choice for her to accept, but now she's in a safe place where I know she'll be well cared for with three good meals a day and 24/7 care. I've had to play "beat the clock" since I got back to upstate New York to get caught up with work responsibilities, animal care, and my own sanity.

Now for the "S" post: "SERIOUSLY?!"

I just bought a new, single brew, inexpensive coffeemaker complete with a small instructional pamphlet inserted inside the box. Personally, I like simple things like on and off buttons, which is why I purchased a basic "vanilla ice cream" kind of brewing device. I really didn't think reading the instructional pamphlet was necessary so I read the warning label out of curiosity.

I discovered these labels are for people who have the IQ of a turnip. Here are a few examples of Mr. Coffee's safeguards for use: (I am not making any of this up. Honestly!)

1. READ ALL INSTRUCTIONS BEFORE USING THE COFFEEMAKER.
2. To protect against electric shock do not immerse the power cord, power plug or coffeemaker in water or any other liquid especially when plugged in.
3. Do not use coffeemaker outdoors.
4. Avoid contact with any moving parts.
5. Do not set a hot decanter on a cold surface.

Seriously?!  Are people really that dumb?

Which reminds me, I asked my gynecologist way back when I was on birth control pills, why he always had the pharmacist type "take orally" on the pill bottle.  He said that one of his patients actually inserted the pill vaginally and wondered why she got pregnant. Seriously?! So I guess that answers the "dumb" question.

Have a great week and happy trails. This post inspired by Jenny Matlock.

Nincompoop

Compliments of Cheezburger

What is a nincompoop? According to the dictionary it's a fool or a simpleton. According to me it's a person with poor judgment and no common sense. It was my grandmother's favorite word.

As children and adolescents, Gram used to call us nincompoops when we did something really stupid, like blowing up paint cans by lighting them on fire. Or cutting one another's hair with her pinking shears. Or balancing on the second floor scaffolding of a new home under construction in the neighborhood. Or catching frogs and snakes and putting them in the bath tub along with grass, water and bugs.

Now that you have a pretty good idea of what a nincompoop is, you have a pretty good idea of who I am or was...or maybe still am.

Have a great day and head on over to Jenny's for some nifty "N" words in celebration of alphabet Thursday.

Joe=Java=Jamoke=Joy

 

There's nothing  better than a steaming, hot cup of coffee early in the morning. It brings me great joy. I love the aroma, the flavor, and the fact that it's the only thing that gets me motivated for barn duty at 6:00 a.m. 

 

Sometimes that wonderful brew is referred to as Java, Joe, or Jamoke.

 

Java is named after the coffee bean produced on the Indonesian island of Java. Imagine that. How clever.  

 

Joe comes from the song, "Old Black Joe" written by Steven Foster around 1850. He also wrote "Beautiful Dreamer" and "Oh! Susanna".

 

Jamoke (pronounced ja.moh.kee) is a combination of the words java and mocha. Now that's a really yummy combo.

 

For all you coffee lovers out there, I'd be curious to know what your favorite blend of java is. Here's to you. 

 

Now, let's go have a cup of joyful Joe at Jenny's.

 

 

Almost but not Quite

Buzi likes to help me in the garden.

 

Out of 225 town houses, my little garden came in second in the 2013 Newport Highlands Garden Contest.

I learned something about myself that's not very nice; I'm a sore loser. I think my garden should have come in first because it's loaded with colorful blooms and is still blooming. The first place winner has a monochromatic look of white petunias with a little purple for color and some dried out hostas.

I think it would be both tacky of me and probably illegal, to put up a picture of the #1 garden, and let you choose; but I'm not that evil.

Besides, I should enjoy the $75 gift certificate I was presented, keep my mouth shut, and be happy with second place. Argh! I don't do well with being second.

What's nice about a garden, no matter how big or how small, is that everyone can enjoy it. I almost got first place, but not quite.

I Don't Want To Set The World On Fire-The Ink Spots

Ink Spots

This is not a Rorschack test. The Ink Spots is the name of a singing group popular in the 1930s and 1940s. They were the precursor to rhythm and blues, rock and roll, and doo-wop. I know this because I used to listen to my grandparents LPs growing up and the Ink Spots were their favorite vocal group.

One song in particular brings a smile to my heart. It's called "I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire." The first line goes like this: "I don't want to set the world on fire, I just want to start a flame in your heart." Ya gotta love the lyrics. Click on the YouTube picture above for some enjoyable smooth, mellow tones and the rest of the lyrics. Then mosey on over to Jenny's for more "I" words.

The Ink Spots

Horse Pucky: Horsie Delights

Surprise, surprise. I decided to use Horse Pucky as the "H" word for alphabet Thursday.

You all know what horse pucky means by now; horse manure in polite circles; horse shit to me. In either case, I sell the cured reconstituted vegetable matter and call it HORSIE DELIGHTS.

HORSIE DELIGHTS work great! Your indoor and outdoor plants will love them. You can use them in at least four different ways.

1. Liquid plant food: Place one HORSIE DELIGHT (one dried horse poop) in a large size empty mayonnaise jar (or other suitable container). Fill with water and let sit for 8 hours. Use about 1/4 cup on indoor plants every other week, then watch 'em grow.

2. Put one HORSIE DELIGHT in a watering can. Let sit 6 hours then sprinkle on outdoor plants. Your flowers will have blossoms the size of pie plates. Well...almost.

3. Dry plant food: Place or crumble one or more HORSIE DELIGHTS on top of soil, around outdoor plants that need OOMPF and let rain wash into the soil.

4. Crumble 1/2 of a HORSIE DELIGHT on top of soil of indoor plant and water as usual. Repeat in eight weeks. 

This stuff works great. One bag of HORSIE DELIGHTS equals approximately 5 gallons of liquid organic plant food. It'll last 3.3 years for one plant. It improves the soil, provides slow release of nutrients, and grows bigger and better flowers, veggies, and fruit.

Currently there's a flower garden contest going on in my townhouse development of 225 town houses. Tomorrow I'll find out who the winner is and let you know. Of course I use HORSIE DELIGHTS in the garden.

Gardening and Georgia O'Keeffe

Gardening is one of the most enjoyable things I do. The garden is small, but it's full of some of  my favorite flowers and is always a work in progress.

One of my flowering front runners are my poppies. Trust me , they're not opium poppies.

I took a close-up picture of one of the blooms the first year of planting. It reminds me of a Georgia O'Keeffe painting. She's one of my favorite artists because I love her large, detailed paintings of flowers. 

My neighbors all wonder why the poppy blooms are so big and colorful. I'll give you readers three guesses. Your first guess will probably be correct.

Jenny's place has some great "G" words for Alphabet Thursday.

Ferris Wheel: Fazed

The letter "F" brings back happy memories; scary but happy.

My grandson, Zane, and I went to the Fireman's Carnival about ten years ago. We had loads of fun at all the booths until we walked by the Ferris wheel. Zane said, "Grammy how about going for a ride?" I replied with a flat out, "No!"

You see, I have a fear of heights. I have no problem flying in an airplane or climbing trees, but I hate climbing ladders, and I'm especially terrified of sitting in an open box attached to a circular moving device, which is at least five stories high, and the open box I'm sitting in, is rocking back forth in the wind. Plus it makes my stomach queasy after a couple of hot dogs and cotton candy.

Because Zane is my grandson, and because I wanted him to have a good time, I gave in and went on the Ferris wheel ride. Big mistake. This was the evening the Ferris wheel broke down for over 30 minutes and we were stuck at the very top swaying back and forth in the breeze. Zane thought it was cool, I was fazed to the max. The cotton candy and hot dogs were doing flips in my stomach and my mental state wasn't so hot.

The only redeeming things were watching the sun go down from a height of 264 feet and the lights come up in the surrounding village and watching Zane have a fun time. Those three things were actually magical. The best part is I didn't throw up.

When the big wheel was repaired it whirred to life, and before long Zane and I were safely on the ground. We were reimbursed the price of the Ferris wheel ride, took our reimbursement and reinvested it in a couple of candy apples.

Alphabet Thursday letter ("F") is brought to you by Jenny Matlock.  

Entrails in the Sky

Jon  and I were sitting on the front porch watching the jets overhead. It was one of those beautiful late spring mornings complete with clear blue sky and bright sunshine. All was peaceful and quiet when I said, "What a great day for the pilots to fly! And look at those entrails in the sky!"

Keep in mind, I'm an English major who spent part of my teaching career creatively educating adolescents on the importance of good grammar.

Jon started laughing.  I said, "What's so funny?" He continued laughing then said, "You're the English major, think about it." "Think about what?!"  I was getting annoyed. "I think you meant contrails, not entrails. Those are contrails being emitted from the jets. If you're seeing entrails, the pilot's in a lot of trouble."

My retort was, "Oh yeah, I knew that." Then I thought, 'Contrails...water vapor, not entrails...exposed intestines.'

Every time we spot a jet flying with a long thin artificial cloud behind it, Jon snickers and says, "Hey Pam, look up in the sky, there's another one of those entrails."

Jet on over to Jenny's for more Alphabet Thursday "E" words.

Dust: How to Create the Perfect Person...or

dust from under fridge

Most household dust is made up of 75% - 90% sloughed off human skin cells and a small percentage of pet dander, which includes loads of DNA. Since I found that out, I feel guilty every time I vacuum or mop under the stove and refrigerator. I figure, maybe I just wiped out Uncle Henry or Aunt Gertrude.

Then I got an idea. If you're smart you'll stop reading right now and run the other way.

My idea is this: If I put all the dust from the vacuum cleaner bag, and all the dust "bunnies" from under the stove and fridge into one big container, then cover it for at least a couple of months, the DNA from everything that ever entered my house would create...ta da...the perfect person...or Super Cat.

Jenny has some fun "D" words for alphabet Thursday. Have a great weekend y'all.

Sink Repair

I got my sink repaired. How do you like it?

My cousin, Patty, sent the above picture to me. I'm beginning to wonder why people keep sending me comics, pictures, and jokes about wine.  HA!

Nuts: How to Catch a Squirrel

As soon as I was out from under my parent's radar, I went to work devising a plan. I'm not sure where Mom and Dad were; probably watching TV or something.

Our kitchen chair was the ideal height for an eight-year-old to stand on, which gave me the perfect opportunity to reach the three bags of mixed nuts in the pantry.

After climbing up on the chair, I quietly picked up the bags, climbed down, then  moved the chair back under the table to erase all traces of evidence.

Prior to all of this, I spread newspapers under the juniper bushes in our back yard, anchored by four strategically placed rocks so the papers wouldn't blow away. Of course I did this when no one was looking.

The next step was to go outside, open the three bags of nuts, and spread them over the weighted newspapers. 

My plan was to catch a squirrel. I wanted a cute, furry, squirrel to keep me company in my room. It would be just the squirrel and me. Friends forever.

 It was tough getting to sleep that night, because I was really excited about my new, secret squirrel venture.

When I looked outside the next morning, every single nut was gone. The newspapers were still intact held down by the rocks, but no nuts and, even worse, no squirrel. Boy, was I ever disappointed.

When my parents went to open a bag of nuts for a snack, they discovered all three bags were missing. I was questioned and denied everything. It was the newspapers that did me in.

When my dad went out to mow the lawn, he saw the newspapers...and the rocks...and put two and two together. I spent a lot of time in my room that day...alone...with no squirrels or anything.

Comics: Reflection in Red

I love comics; always have. This one was emailed to me yesterday by Horse Pucky Pal, Randy, who  said the comic reminded him of me. Hm-m-m, I'm not exactly sure what he meant by that. ; )

This comic makes me laugh every time I look at it.

Here's hoping you all enjoy these beverage glasses as equally as I do, especially if they're filled with good wine. Have a great weekend.

Thanks Jenny for providing the platform for us to share one another's joys, triumphs, and overall silliness.

Buzi

Meet Buzi (pronounced Boo jee). Buzi means kiss in Polish.

Buzi is wondering where the real mouse is.

Time to stop and smell the flowers.

This sweet little feline came into my life after being abandoned by her previous owners; left outside for six months to fend for herself. When I adopted her, she had some health issues, but after a year and a half she's starting to feel and look much better.

Now she sleeps in a king size bed instead of under a porch..

I took her home from my vet's office on February 1st,

Happy Valentine, Buzi

after they called to inform me that a neighbor found her under their porch, terrified, hungry, and cold. February is Valentine month, so it was only fitting to name her Buzi.

She's turned out to be a sweet, lovely, gentle feline, who really appreciates her new digs.

A kiss for Jenny to celebrate Alphabet Thursday.

The Day After: A Sobering Experience

Holy Sepulchre Cemetery in Rochester, NY

 

This post has nothing to do with drinking. It has everything to do with remembering. Specifically, remembering why we're here in the first place.

Jon and I decided to visit Holy Sepulchre Cemetery on Memorial Day for a variety of reasons. We both have family buried there, Jon is an Army veteran, and the press was saying how beautifully stirring the waving flags are on our soldiers gravesites. Our local media was right.

I can tell you it sent chills up my spine. Looking at the photos we took still gives me ample reason to keep a box of tissues by my side. It makes me pause to give thanks for all we have.

These  brave men died so we can be free to worship as we please, write what we want, work at what we love best or at least work, and enjoy the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

We're very fortunate to live in this country with all it's warts pimples, and imperfections. But they're minor inconveniences compared to others who live in countries where women are treated like second class citizens, and people like me, both male and female, who rant about our politicians, would be hung at high noon in front of a cheering mob of political guerillas.    

Every day get down on your knees and give thanks to our fallen soldiers whose ultimate sacrifice keeps us free. Do it for you. Do it for them.

They can no longer kneel. 





Ass: Equus Asinus

There are probably more names for a donkey than any other equine species. It's Latin name is Equus asinus. The male donkey is called a  Jack, hence the word Jack Ass, which I often call our local and national politicians.

The female is a Jennet or Jenny; no relation to our loveable Jenny Matlock, who decided to do another round of alphabet Thursday. She'll be sorry. In fact she probably already is, after reading this "A" post.

Donkeys are fun to have around. They're highly intelligent, and love social interaction with people. They're exceptionally good with small children with whom they establish a formidable bond, especially against parents .

If you're in the market for something larger than a dog, but not as big as a horse, a donkey is for you.The best part is, if you call your husband a Jack Ass, he'll think you're talking to the donkey.

Zero: Before and After

If I put two zeros in front of the number seven, I  think of James Bond. You know 007. 

Zero is a very important number and numerical digit. It fulfills a major role in math. I hate math, but I do know that zeros placed before a number means less cash in my pocket, like $.07 cents, while a zero after a number equals more cash such as $70.  

Zero is slang for zilch or zip. It can also be a temperature reading in upstate New York. In fact, four months ago is was 07 degrees here at night, today it's 70 degrees. Now you're getting the picture as to the importance of zero.

Just to let you know how really important zero is, last week I had $700 in my checking account. Now I have $.07 cents. If anyone would like to send me three zeros after a 10, my zip code is 14609.

Zip on over to Jenny's. You'll be glad you did.

Yellow Brick Road: A Political Rant

For those of you who have seen the movie, The Wizard of Oz, as a child, you probably should see it again as an adult if you haven't already. It has all sorts of 1800 historical, political overtones, which are still prevalent today. Some things never change.

Now I know why I was afraid of some of the characters in the movie the first time I saw it. It represented the political leaders of the time.

Just a quick overview:

• We all know who the Wizard represents.
• Oz is another name for gold. 
• Dorothy represents the American people and their values, honesty, loyalty, and resourcefulness. 
• The Cowardly Lion could be any politician; a load roar with no power or bite. He was looking for courage.
• Scarecrow, even though he wanted a brain, represents the American farmer who is an adept problem solver, hard worker, and gets paid squat for what s/he produces.
• Tin man represents the industrial workers who often feel dehumanized especially after losing their jobs. He was looking for a heart.

The Emerald Palace and the Emerald City is the White House in Washington, D.C. Everyone thought if they followed the yellow brick road it would lead them to riches and power. It worked for  politicians because their riches were made on the backs of the farmers and the industrial workers.

Dorothy, Scarecrow, and the Tin Man saw the Wizard very differently, which is a classic example of how politicians change their stories depending on who they're talking to and who the largest contributor is to their campaign chest.

Bottom line, the Wizard was declared a fraud by everyone who followed the yellow brick road to Oz. My point is politicians aren't going to help us because they're too busy helping themselves. We really don't need most of them.

All the searching we do for that yellow brick road, is nothing more than a ruse. You find what you need within yourself. 

Follow the paved road to Jenny's for more "Y" fun.

Bert and Ernie

Bert and Ernie



Okay, okay, so I'm not perfect; probably too many horse pucky fumes.

However, I do go to my neighborhood Catholic church once a week to polish my halo. That's polish not Polish. I am Polish, but I digress. (No Polish jokes please.)

I also have two guardian angels named Bert and Ernie. Seriously, those are their real names. It's short for Bertha and Ernestine.

Bert's and Ernie's job is to help me sleep at night and give me peace of mind during the day. They are always singing, "Sleep my child, and peace attend thee" to the tune of "Great Balls of Fire."

Peace and love.

Fly on over to Jenny's to check out the other posts using the Saturday Centus italicized prompt.

X Chromosome

"X" is for x chromosome.

Okay folks here we go, right into our first genetics lesson. Or is it biology? Maybe it's math. Well now, let's see, two x chromosomes make a girl. One x and one y chromosome makes a boy. Sounds simple enough and it is, except for one thing. There's a huge difference between males and females. Aside from the obvious physical contrasts there are definitely some serious flaws in the x y chromosome.

Don' t get me wrong, I think men are wonderful. They just think differently than women, which is probably a good thing unless they don't think at all.

Let me state three examples:

1. Driving along in the countryside, a woman spots a lovely crystal clear stream with a pair of ducks paddling along peacefully, and comments, "Pull over Honey, I'd love to get a picture of that and send it to the grandchildren. Man, affectionately referred to as "Honey", says, "If I had my gun with me, we'd be having duck dinner tonight. Oh, by the way, I need to stop and go pee in the stream."

2. When discussing human  mortality,  a woman usually opts for discussions on spirituality, religion, or personal faith formation. Men, on the other hand, want to decide which daring adventure they should consider before the end of life, such as alligator wrestling or sky diving or maybe even bungee-jumping over the Grand Canyon.

3. Last, but not least, my idea of flowers, as an anniversary gift, is a dozen long stemmed red roses, not a bag of King Arthur flour so I can make chocolate chip cookies.

There you have it, folks, combine, genetics, biology, and math and you have a recipe for...uh...chocolate chip cookies.

Exit over to Jenny's and find more exciting blogs.

Butter or OIl

Whoever said, "A little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing," was right. I have enough mechanical savvy to be dangerous.

While out for a drive, I heard some pinging and dinging under the hood. 'Not a good sign,' I thought. When I pulled into the driveway, I popped the hood, propped it up with that thing-a-ma-jig arm thing, and proceeded to take a look-see. Since, I was out of motor oil, I decided to go in the house and melt butter in a large skillet over medium-high heat to replace the oil. Bad idea.

For a long time it smelled like burnt steel on toast around here.

Join Jenny and the gang for Saturday Centus. This week's prompt is in italics.

Wine Signs

"W" is for wine signs.

A friend of mine emailed me The Miracle of Wine this morning, probably because I enjoy a glass of fermented Merlot grapes now and then, as well as ingenious, witty wording on signs. I hope you enjoy these clever, humorous signs as much as I do.

 

A toast to  Jenny  in celebration of women all over the world, and Alphabet Thursday. 



Yippee! Wowsers!

Finally, I was able to get the "Follower" icons back on my home page. Thanks, Nick from Along These Lines for all your help. You're the best. As it turns out, it was a Java script problem that I was able to resolve in the wee hours of the morning.

How tacky; I just realized I'm following my own blog. Not sure how that happened. I probably fat-fingered some button on my computer. I'm kinda afraid to delete myself as a follower for fear I'll wipe out all my hard work.

Well here goes, delete time.

Almost There

Horse Pucky is almost back to normal (software wise). Almost all recent pictures are back, but I can't figure out how to get Google Followers (Friend Connect) pictures back. Anyone have any ideas?

Good Grief!

Something is seriously wrong with my horse pucky blog. I'll keep you posted. My pictures disappeard, my followers disappeared, what a mess! All I gotta say is horse pucky!!

~The Horse Pucky Queen

Alphabet Thursday - "V"

V is for vegetables.

Nothing fancy here, just plain, fresh, hand picked vegetables from the garden. I don't even have a recipe for you because I love to eat my veggies right out of the ground, or off the vine, or from a stalk. You can keep your dips, dunks, and frizzles, I like my produce au natural.

There are some favorite dishes I enjoy such as fresh asparagus sauteed with mushrooms, vegetarian chili with home grown tomatoes, and pizza with fresh garden veggies on top.

It's that time of year when I'm really looking forward to fresh produce from our local farmers at their roadside stands, as well as my own produce grown in large ceramic pots on the back patio. Fresh is best especially when it's fertilized with cured horse pucky.

Time to vacate the premises and see what's going on at Jenny's place.

Bon Appetit!

Alphabet Thursday - "U"

U is for underwear.

Have you ever noticed how many different kinds of underwear there are?

Men's undergarments are fairly simple, just like them. The guys usually wear briefs or undershorts. Briefs are usually plain white with some occasional solid colors thrown in for interest. The male undershorts tend to be a bit more sophisticated, consisting of madras plaid, or pin stripes or even polka dots. Most guys either wear a white undershirt or no undershirt at all.

Women's, unmentionables are much more interesting, especially to men. The bottoms come in various cuts such as high rise, french bikini, low rise, no rise, and thongs. They also come in all sorts of colors such as soft pink, hot pink, bright pink, and neon pink...and that's just one color. Of course, there are tops to match.

As a female, I consider myself lucky to be able to have such a wide variety of underwear choices, as long as it's comfy. Those thong things would never work for me.

Mosey on over to Jenny's  and take a peak at other interesting "U" posts.

Fruit Loops



F is for fruit loops. They were a tasty breakfast treat when my children were in elementary school. After breakfast, in the summertime, all the neighborhood kids made necklaces out of the colorful fruit loops then strung their fruit loop necklaces on tree brances for the birds to eat.



Your job as horse pucky readers is to choose the real fruit loops in these images. The first person to respond gets a gift bag of Horsie Delights for your indoor plants. Send me your address so I can mail your gift.


E is for Escargot




Escargot is one of my favorite foods. If it's on the restaurant menu I order it every time. Most people think snails are gross and disgusting. If it crawls on the ground, they won't eat or even look at it.

Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize winning humorist says, "Escargot is French for fat, crawling, bag of phlegm." It's France's way of tricking us Americans into eating what they find on their lawns and then charge us for it.

 

Seriously, when snails are repacked in their shells with parsley, rich butter, and garlic then baked or grilled it's simply fantastic. Don't forget your favorite Merlot and some hot crusty bread.

I love Dave Barry's books. Enjoy his brilliant humor along with a plate of snails, bread and wine. Happy reading and bon appetite.


D is for Daffodil

 

 

I love daffodils or narcissus or whatever you call those early  bloomers. It's the first sign of Spring in these parts. The only problem is, it's been so cold, those clumps of predominately yellow with white flowers have decided to continue in hibernation mode. 

 

What I think I'll do is download a picture of the daffodils in my garden from last year, so you know I, at least, have a garden. After you look at the picture, take a peak at the little ditty I've composed you below.

  

Spring has sprung,

My, aren't we lucky.

 

Your blooms do best,

when you use pucky.

 

The Horse Pucky Queen

Alphabet Thursday - "T"




"T" is for Toilet

There are loads of choices for the letter "T". First I was going to
use the word TULIPS, but I already downloaded a picture of tulips for an Easter post. Then I went through my photos and discovered this shot. I couldn't resist.

It's not pretty, but it's real. Besides, what else do you expect from a blog with a name like Horse Pucky?!

Bottoms up for Bear.

The big question is, why do cats drink out of the toilet? If anyone can come up with an answer to the question, let me know.

Trek on over to Jenny's for more "T" surprises. 

C is for Crayons

C  C C C Crayons

I love crayons. Really. It brings out the little kid in me. Crayons are uplifting, bright, and make me want to go on occasional, therapeutic coloring sprees.

This is my simple post today along with my uncomplicated, unsophisticated work of art. It's no multi million dollar Picasso, but at least you know what it is.

Before anybody says it...I'll be sure not to give up my day job.

Buffalo Bills and the Taxpayer Blues

B is for the Buffalo Bills

For the past 50 years, the NY state government has used our tax dollars for social programs such a helping the poor and disabled. The Cuomo administration is now using our hard earned money for themselves. (Which, of course, they've always done, but the following is a little more blatant).

They now have a 12 seat luxury box at Ralph Wilson Stadium as part of a $130 million deal to keep the struggling Bills in New York state for at least another seven years. I was hoping we could pawn them off to some far region in Canada. "Them" meaning both our NY state politicians and the Buffalo Bills.

Once again, us plain, ordinary, everyday taxpayers get the royal boot up the butt in the form of more taxes. The only thing I can do to get even is to apply for the job of quarterback.

The Bills are looking for a new QB since they fired Fitzpatrick. I'd be a much better team player because I'm focused, cool under pressure, I've got a great throwing arm from lifting 75# hay bales every day, I can run fast, and I can get real mean when I think about where my tax dollars are going.

I figure if I get hurt the first game I'll never have to play again because my multi-million dollar contract will protect me for at least two years...until the state takes all my money.

Art Cuts

A is for Art.

Kudos to the people who privately support the arts. Supporting culture was in the hands of the government for a while until Uncle Sam got the brilliant idea to spend taxpayer dollars on things that blow people up.

Now art support is primarily accomplished through private donations. The money is used to pay the painters whose impressions and expressions are difficult to interpret unless you stand on your head or squint real hard.

Don't get me wrong, I love the fine arts. I also like different types of paintings. I'm still trying to figure out a Picasso print someone gave me. Pablo's print looks like a bad dream caused by eating too much chorizo pizza with poblano chilis, and cheap wine.

Maybe I'll just take off my glasses and stand on my head.

HAPPY EASTER

HE LIVES!

"May the God of hope fill you with joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope and love by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13



Tulip bed at Highland Park; Rochester, NY

I wish all of you a very blessed, happy Resurrection day. May Christ's Peace, Love, and Joy be with you always. ~Pam aka The Horse Pucky Queen

Alphabet Thursday - "S"

"S" is for seventy...70...septuagenarian, which is how old I'll be and what I'll become on April 10th. There are loads of "S" words to choose from, but I picked this one because it wasn't too long ago I thought 70 was ancient. I still think it's ancient, but in a cool sorta way, and I'll tell you why.

1. I can ride faster and shoot straighter than I did when I was 20. Just get out of my way.

 

2. I work smarter instead of harder. Then I take a nap.

3. I can say and do whatever I want and nobody says anything. They just roll their eyes.

4. I don't take too kindly to stupidity, especially in politicians.

5. I savor  each moment especially with family and friends.

6. Most importantly, I am blessed with super good health. 

To all of you who read this...thank you. To those of you who comment...it's like getting a bouquet of flowers. 

Saunter over to Jenny Matlock's blog for more cool "S" words.

Horse Pucky Award of the Week

Well, well, another politician caught doing what the rest of us would be arrested for, but instead, is still "serving" the public. Ha!

Steve Katz, NY state assemblyman, got caught speeding on the NY state thruway. When he was finally stopped by a state trooper, it was discovered Mr. Katz had a bag of "wacky tobacky" in his vehicle. According to the officer who stopped Mr. Katz, the vehicle Katz was driving smelled like burning marijuana fields. To make matters worse, Steve Katz  sits on the Assembly's Alcoholism and Drug Abuse Committee. Our NY tax dollars hard at work! "sneer"

The Horse Pucky Award of the Week goes to Assemblyman Steve Katz for disobeying the very laws he's trying to uphold. Tsk, tsk.

Alphabet Thursday - "R"

RALPHIE

"R" is for Ralphie who is affectionately referred to as Ralphie the Moocher. When he wags his tail his whole body shimmies back and forth. This cute little corgie-beagle-whatever else mix looks up at me with those big brown eyes of his, and I just have to give him a dog bisquit. He's only allowed two; one before I clean stalls in the morning and one when I've completed my chores. I usally find the first bisquit buried in the bedding of the last stall I clean.

He's, without a  doubt, the cutest dog I've ever seen. When I first met him, he was quite ferocious, but as he got to know me, he decided I'd be a good pal. Probably because I'm a sucker for big brown eyes and carry dog bisquits in my pockets.  

This post was inspired by Jenny Matlock and Alphabet Thursday.

Horse Pucky Spring

Sad, but true, this is actually a garden.

I took a look at my garden today and it's just pathetic. It's 33 degrees outside with wind chills making the air feel more like 19 degrees.The ground's still semi-frozen with some green sprouts shooting up, but I think those sprouts are seriously thinking of going underground.

Currently, our landscape around here consists of drab brown, gray, and dull army green. Leafless branches on the trees add to the dreary rather than cheery surroundings. At least the patches of white snow nestled among the dried leaves is somewhat of a pick-me-up.

Welcome to Spring in upstate New York. I know it won't be long before the sun and the rich soil weaves it's magic, producing a bountiful garden of flowers. It's time for me to help those future posies along with ample bushel baskets of horse pucky. My neighbors usually complain about the odor for at least a month, even after mulching, but they are rewarded with bouquets of homegrown flowers through the spring and summer months.

Happy first day of Spring!

Blessings Br-r-r

Br-r-r, it's 37 degrees with the northeast wind blowing snow swirls on this St. Patrick's Day. It doesn't matter what the temperature is outside because it's always a good day to celebrate our blessings. To all of you, I'd like to wish you a very Happy St. Patrick's Day from Silver, Sadie, Buzi, and me. By the way, kiss me, I'm Polish.


Buzi

Silver and Sadie