Showing posts with label church. Show all posts
Showing posts with label church. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Free Admission




I was driving by a small, brick church on the way to the grocery store this morning, and saw a sign out front that reads, "Heaven is free. Details inside." For those of you who are haven't been to church in a while or don't go at all, your may want to stop in for the particulars.

There are some interesting "F" words at Jenny's.


Friday, November 5, 2010

Church Bulletin Bloopers

After church I always pick up the parish bulletin to see what's going on in our community. The wonderful ladies in our church, who put the bulletin together, are usually very accurate in their reporting and keyboarding, but every once in a while they make typographical boo-boos and/or grammatical errors. 

Here are a few bloopers that made me laugh:

1. Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of the things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

2. The sermon this morning, 'Jesus Walks on Water'. The sermon this evening, 'Searching for Jesus'.

3. A bean supper will be held Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

4. Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

5. Potluck supper this Sunday at 5:30 pm. Prayer and medication to follow.

6. This evening at 7:00 pm there will be a hymn singing at the park across from the church. Bring your blankets and come prepared to sin.

7. The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Parish would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

8. The associate pastor has a new fund raising slogan: 'I upped my campaign pledge, so up yours.'

Again, anyone who writes anything, be sure to PROOFREAD!